On the Wal-mart note, a friend needed a meat-mallet and I wanted to make-sure that Spiro was on their 4$ prescription list. This particular friend wasn’t in the “let’s not shop at Wal-mart” boat thats so popular nowadays, so we drive there. I take a phone-call while my friend goes inside; I then realized I was in a very unfriendly environment, the front of a Wal-mart in a not-so-great part of town. There’s a couple unkempt individuals asking people for change and this big guy keeps going “hey bro, got some change” to everyone. So the phone call ends, I’ve maybe been standing outside for a 3 mins top, I’m not going to go in and try to find my friends, and its like a million degrees outside so I’m not going to wait by the car. I’m trying to not pay attention, standing off to the side, pretending to text, when he goes “hey bro” almost directly to me… I kinda look up, realizing he’s talking to someone else. Now I should point out that I wasn’t well dressed myself, just a pair of jeans and my “I Hate Myself and I Want To Die” T-shirt, hadn’t shaved my face that day, but I was pretty far away from my town and I didn’t plan on going anywhere, I looked passable, I just wasn’t wearing make-up or anything. When I look up, he scans me and says “why when I say bro you look up when you got titties”. I just shy away and look at my phone and start walking towards the car, dude gets up and starts following me. “so you’re a guy? Are you a guy?”. I get to the car and slip in, I smirked a little to myself as the electric window rolled up, like an old lady in the city trying to avoid the riff-raff.

The guy just kept waving his arms and questioning my gender, unfortunately this isn’t terribly uncommon, to quote Clerks, “this town is full of savages”. I’m calling my friend inside when I see a this brown fist come out of nowhere, knocking the guy clean to the ground, and 10 seconds later there’s 5 mexican guys in Wal-Mart uniforms chasing the dazed and stumbling dude out of the parking lot. The guy who threw the punch was being equally creepy to be honest, he told me he’d been waiting for a reason to punch that guy all day and started trying to lay a lot of game on me, but luckily my friend ran up to the car to save me from the maniacs that have swarmed me in my 3 minutes at Wal-Mart. Driving away I heard my good Samaritan yell something along the lines of “see if I help you again… bitch!

Anyway, this was far from traumatic, more just tiring. I can’t even go get a meat-mallet without something random like this happening to me. I guess I deserve it, living outside of the mainstream, drawing attention to myself just by the way I live in general. People must think I’m selfish and so they want to punish me, or maybe they just think other people won’t care if they fuck with an outcast like me, maybe get some torches and run me out of the village.

I didn’t learn anything from this experience, except maybe that the concept of Alcatraz or Escape From N.Y./L.A. is already in effect, and instead of on an island its just in big warehouses and they build one in every city and if you don’t live up to class requirements you’re forced to go there, at least every once in a while. No variety, nutrition-less food, censored media and everything feels like it comes from a sliding tray behind metal grating. And by the way, i’m a total hypocrite, in ways you couldn’t possibly imagine.

I’m done thinking about Wal-mart, I’m going to have to go there at least once a month, I’ll just have to get one of those K-9 training bite-jackets before hand.

One thought on “superjail

  1. Wow! Whilst the Walmarts up north have always had an 'subclass' connotation to them, I can't say I ever noticed a 'subhuman' element. Glad you got out of that okay. O.O

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