Quick summary of the last 2 posts. My friends girlfriends moms dad gave me a sex machine, and I’ve been lamenting about relationship problems i’ve had in the past, theres some funny stuff, tragic stuff, its a rollercoaster ride through the written word… to be serious, these last few months I’ve actually felt proud of my writing, yes it is a little stream of thought and I basically failed out of English in High School so I don’t have some of the basics down, but I feel good about typing these words and I hope you feel good reading them.
But you know what doesn’t feel good? Having a guy around for almost 7 months, him screwing you once and then completely malfunctions during sex to the point where he turns into a worthless pile of scrap metal?
Yeah, i’m a woman scorned, and it’s all my fault. Our relationship, which was only based on sex to begin with, came to a loud, frustrating but possibly saveable disaster. This is the part the post where I stop talking as if the sex machine is a real person. I was happy with the video I shot in the last post, its kinda silly and fun I think, but I usually shoot a few videos if I wasn’t 100% satisfied with the last one just to see if I can do it better. I kinda fix my hair, zip-up my little suit, and throw the towel over the machine and with the movement of the bed, it accidentally triggered the device and jammed the towel into the rotating mechanism. It stops hard and starts whirring louder than usual. I immediately unplug it and pull out the very tangled up towel. look it over and it seems fine… plug it in and it’s dead. My brother and I tried to get this thing to work for hours, I think theres a simple option at any hardware store that would be under 5$, the battery and engine work fine, touchy but fine. I also wanted to point out that my brother has nothing invested in the sex machine, he just likes working on mechanical stuff, we’ve built many a computer together and love toying around with stuff, remember, this machine has been a family matter since the beginning!
About my robotic sex toy breaking down, it really made me sad, I kinda cried a little bit but then felt selfish and upset with the whole thing. I guess its for the best, it’ll give me a a little engineering project to work on, maybe make in nice enough to sell, put in an Ipod dock or something. That sounds like a fun afternoon, reanimating the dismantled body of a one-night stand… oh, and, and this is the part of the post where I talk about my boyfriend, Bender, like he’s a real person again. After our the first time, I cleaned up and everything and since I have a queen size bed, I didn’t put him away, I just took the attachment off, turned on some brian eno and went to bed. In my state of slumber, I did cuddle with Bender a little bit, it sounds crazy, but just feeling the steel and weight next to me while I slept was… comforting.
I’m a pretty silly girl, and this is a pretty silly post, so just look forward to the next couple posts where I’ll be talking about how I’ve trained my voice and even more cool stuff, and spread the word! If you’re looking for video of me actually using the thing, I only did one and its clumsy, but strangely erotic. Contact me personally if you’re interested in making a donation and getting access to this and other sexy videos of myself in a constantly updating private youtube channel… or you could always just send a donation anytime, it’s tough out there for a girl like me, and I can use all the help I can get.
Thanks for reading, and even if Bender is unfixable, at least we can remember that one special time ❤