Monthly Archives: September 2010

survive

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ahhh, I survived folsom street fair. Pics soon, I have just a moment to post but I wanted to say I am alive and well, took a moment to retreat outside of the city for today, chance to put my foot up. I’m sunburnt like crazy as well, but I’ve got a smile on my face and some good things coming my way. I finally got some legal stuff figured out, getting ready for the 5th, my big unemployment hearing… I’m so excited… I’ve said it before, but looking 6 months into the future I know I’ll have my life a little more together, I’ve been working on things that won’t pay off just yet, but will. Mark my words!!! All is well, I have tons to say about Folsom, this week, my feelings and where I am, but for now I must run.

Love
❤

nowhere nothin’ fuckup

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All is not well in the world of Riley, the crushing feeling of hopelessness, i’m going to put on a smiley face and hopefully have a good experience, do some good networking today, maybe start going down a more positive path. I am starting to understand what its like to be broken, helpless in many ways, I hope I don’t feel like this for long. Oct. 5th I should be out of this mess, the unemployment appeal is hopefully going to net me enough in unpaid unemployment to get an apartment… it’s easier to find a job with an address and a judicially affirmed unfair firing, my employment record sucks until all this gets figured out. I’ve always had a job, i’ve been more productiv creatively in the last 26 days than I ever have, but at what cost? I’m trying my best to hide it but I am living out of my backpack, employers don’t jump on that when theres a million college students looking for jobs. The good won’t come out just yet, I’m going to fall apart, I need to find happiness, joy, love, safety, rest. I’m hurting right now, a hurdle to overcome. I am going to make it, I just hope I don’t destroy my ankle/lose my mind before then. I’m awesome, I can do it, I will become everything I want to be, until then I’m just a nowhere nothin’ fuckup.

now say a word for Karen Brown
she can’t tell the night from the day
they threw her out in the street
just like a cat she landed on her feet

fuuuuu

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Folsom is today, i’m dressed up in my little shortalls and diaper 🙂


All is not well in the world of Riley, the crushing feeling of hopelessness, i’m going to put on a smiley face and hopefully have a good experience, do some good networking today, maybe start going down a more positive path. I am starting to understand what its like to be broken, helpless in many ways, I hope I don’t feel like this for long. Oct. 5th I should be out of this mess, the unemployment appeal is hopefully going to net me enough in unpaid unemployment to get an apartment… it’s easier to find a job with an address and a judicially affirmed unfair firing, my employment record sucks until all this gets figured out. I’ve always had a job, i’ve been more productiv creatively in the last 26 days than I ever have, but at what cost? I’m trying my best to hide it but I am living out of my backpack, employers don’t jump on that when theres a million college students looking for jobs. The good won’t come out just yet, I’m going to fall apart, I need to find happiness, joy, love, safety, rest. I’m hurting right now, a hurdle to overcome. I am going to make it, I just hope I don’t destroy my ankle/lose my mind before then. I’m awesome, I can do it, I will become everything I want to be, until then I’m just a nowhere nothin’ fuckup.


now say a word for Karen Brown
she can’t tell the night from the day
they threw her out in the street
just like a cat she landed on her feet

status

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Riley Status: optimistic
Ankle Status: not any better : (
Location Status: back in the city until (?)

I really wish I had the time to write the post I really wanted to, its all just scattered notes and thoughts right now, something about weedwackers and unsettling dreams and how you can masturbate to yourself if you put your thumb over the face… it was going to be a stunning epic, a defining moment for the blog, but for now all I have for you is pictures. These, my first ever studio pictures as a girl speak better for me, they’re prettier and a little more focused ❤

cheer up

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Hey there friends! I’m heading back to SF, back to the grind, getting a P.O. box and doing the name change, I’m considering dancing again this week, a couple days of rest has left my ankle feeling about the same, but i’m still a little nervous, I must tread lightly. I need to get excited, the city will get my motor going again, I’m feeling kinda cute and vulnerable right now, not something you want to be in the tenderloin. Toughen up Riley, you can’t stay here in Sacramento, its bad news, move forward! Folsom street fair is coming up this weekend, I’m definitely going to be there, shoot me an email if you’re going!

More stuff soooooooon!

sweet little diaper girl

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Hey there friends ❤ I'm heading back to SF, back to the grind, getting a P.O. box and doing the name change, I'm considering dancing again this week, a couple days of rest has left my ankle feeling about the same, but i'm still a little nervous, I must tread lightly. I need to get excited, the city will get my motor going again, I'm feeling kinda cute and vulnerable right now, not something you want to be in the tenderloin. Toughen up Riley, you can't stay here in Sacramento, its bad news, move forward! Folsom street fair is coming up this weekend, I'm definitely going to be there, shoot me an email if you're going.

I’ll be writing more soon, here’s a cute little picture taken just yesterday.Wish me safety, luck and prosperity, i’m still your little girl in diapers, stockings and paci ❤

zzzzzzzzzz

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Variables!

They are the key to interesting situations, but in this case the reason why making videos is sometimes pretty difficult. I’ve done limited filming in the bay area just for the reason that I don’t want some dude running by and stealing it while i’m getting my blog on, i’m nervous about being followed even just exposing what I have in my bag, i don’t want a bunch of theives following around, a bunch of dingos trying to take my baby. I should have a chance once I get more settled, get a crew etc… soon enough

What I’m trying to get at is sometimes videos just don’t go great, sometimes theres a dalmatian snoring in the background, and I don’t notice until I’m editing the video. Sometimes i sneeze or make a weird face or do something i couldn’t imagine showing the public. Many of my videos are 1-shot stream of thought, i’m working on more dynamic ways to use what I have, but for now I still have to be vigilant, not get frustrated by bad shoots or weird sounds. Though I refuse to publish anything too awful, I don’t want to hold back on a video like this just because of  bit of snoring. I am going to be premiering an adult site, separate from RileyKilo.com but similar content. As for now, parts 2-4 of the quivers video, which includes my miraculous hands-free orgasm (!) are available for a donation of over 10$, you can have access to my private blog for a donation over $50, but that also comes with a lovely commemorative tote bag. Ok, no tote bag, but my private blog is pretty cool, sexy videos, and I also make private videos with whatever content you’re interested in, i generally make these case by case so feel free to use the contact me form above 🙂

I could really use the money right now, so help out if you can and you will be greatly appreciated, and rewarded for your kindness! Here’s part 1, the only one that has a snoring puppy in the background, we were playing ball and the puppy didn’t last as long as me ❤

teddy bear picnic

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Inglorious Basterds
Bronson
and now… Shutter Island

Last night my friends watched Inglorious Basterds, a calculatingly brutal movie, and tonight, we watched Bronson, and we just started shutter island.. before i decided to name this post “Teddy Bear Picnic”, surprising that the main characters name is “Teddy”. Shutter Island looks pretty fail compared to the last two, I’m not a fan of the 300 kind of CGI background look. Make it black and white not Sepia! The crossdressing brother from The Drew Carey Show is also in it, kinda fels like a bunch of celebrities putting on a high school interpretation of “Twin Peaks” with a ending that broadcasts itself with little mystery, like say, the story of the titanic… ha. Whatever, i’m not so worried, looks like it might be a good movie… Ok, I’ll stop narrating the movie and get to my point.

I’m a sweet little girl, you know that by reading my site, i’m cute and fun and all that. I’ve been receiving a wealth of responses saying “I can’t believe you’re the kind of girl that would strip” or “poor girl, how will you make it on your own” and my response to that is, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW! I’ve been dealing with the ins and outs of the independent world, i’ve been on the streets on the east coast for a bit of time, and have always kept my ears to the pavement in Sacramento. Sacramento is a small town with an underground community that keeps things exciting, without saying too much, there’s a decent scene going down around there, and I’ve seen some of the grimier bits.

I could go on about the places i’ve been, the things I’ve seen, the back-alleys, the darkness and the energy, the belligerence and the morning afters, the brights lights in a dim places. All you need to know is that I’m tough, I’m a survivor, I will keep going and keep going stronger, better, faster until I find a place to rest, and I will extrovert my efforts to promote these feelings of confidence in others. This grime, these things I see, the struggle and everything, it just makes the little girl bits that much sweeter. There is no binary to the human experience, the good and the bad all kinda melts together into the wonder that is life.

My next post is a love letter i wrote to my teddy bear, its sad but not without hope. Don’t despair! All is well! If things are down and out for you, understand that the nectar of life is not always sweet, but unique and amazing nonetheless. Don’t fret little ones, the world is a globe, the sun always shines.

teddy bear picnic

by

Inglorious Basterds
Bronson
and now… Shutter Island

Last night my friends watched Inglorious Basterds, a calculatingly brutal movie, and tonight, we watched Bronson, and we just started shutter island.. before i decided to name this post “Teddy Bear Picnic”, surprising that the main characters name is “Teddy”. Shutter Island looks pretty fail compared to the last two, I’m not a fan of the 300 kind of CGI background look. Make it black and white not Sepia! The crossdressing brother from The Drew Carey Show is also in it, kinda fels like a bunch of celebrities putting on a high school interpretation of “Twin Peaks” with a ending that broadcasts itself with little mystery, like say, the story of the titanic… ha. Whatever, i’m not so worried, looks like it might be a good movie… Ok, I’ll stop narrating the movie and get to my point.

I’m a sweet little girl, you know that by reading my site, i’m cute and fun and all that. I’ve been receiving a wealth of responses saying “I can’t believe you’re the kind of girl that would strip” or “poor girl, how will you make it on your own” and my response to that is, YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW! I’ve been dealing with the ins and outs of the independent world, i’ve been on the streets on the east coast for a bit of time, and have always kept my ears to the pavement in Sacramento. Sacramento is a small town with an underground community that keeps things exciting, without saying too much, there’s a decent scene going down around there, and I’ve seen some of the grimier bits.

I could go on about the places i’ve been, the things I’ve seen, the back-alleys, the darkness and the energy, the belligerence and the morning afters, the brights lights in a dim places. All you need to know is that I’m tough, I’m a survivor, I will keep going and keep going stronger, better, faster until I find a place to rest, and I will extrovert my efforts to promote these feelings of confidence in others. This grime, these things I see, the struggle and everything, it just makes the little girl bits that much sweeter. There is no binary to the human experience, the good and the bad all kinda melts together into the wonder that is life.

My next post is a love letter i wrote to my teddy bear, its sad but not without hope. Don’t despair! All is well! If things are down and out for you, understand that the nectar of life is not always sweet, but unique and amazing nonetheless. Don’t fret little ones, the world is a globe, the sun always shines.