After a bit of a lull, a slow season and some pouty posts, I’ve got something fun to share with you!
I had a photoshoot last Saturday that went great, love working with Strokers as the shoots are always low-chatter and low-stress. That night I met with the promotional people at ifriends and the lovely Wendy Summers. We drankand talked industry, made plans to cam and be a featured performer on Ifriends. Then a pre-awards party at a producers place, had a big day coming up so I only poured a little Jameson in a red plastic cup. I schmooze and connect with old friends then head home to cuddle with bear. Did I mention I have a new haircut? Love my bangs!
I wake up and look over a list of questions about AB/DL life that I’ll be answering for a TV documentary about “extreme” relationships. I take a cross town metro ride while thoughts swirl around about the best phrasing, things I want to avoid, relatable concepts I wanted to portray. I showed up on set and didn’t hit any homeruns, but I think I put out some good ideas. Back on the metro and heading to the awards. A friend picks me up downtown and I change into my outfit in the passenger seat with one leg up on the dashboard pulling my stockings up, good view of my undies if anyone was looking. I put on my little Lolita dress and my Mary-Janes and we headed towards Glendale.
I walked the red carpet, I smiled and shined, maybe the only girl wearing flats in the whole building. I’d been nominated for “Best Non-Typical Model” and “Best Scene” for a shoot I did with Wendy Summers, a particularly aggressive affair called “Managed”. I didn’t expect to win anything, I was mostly there to connect with industry folks and show off my cute new bangs. I was a little social butterfly Riley at the Ifriends table, flirting around the room getting cards and hugging friends, even little Candi was there! The Non-Typical Model award went to a tall blonde who showed up in a pig mascot suit to which people were doing all sorts of suggestive things with. Shortly after was the Best Scene award… Wendy and I looked at each other with hesitant optimism. When they announced the winners (us) we both jumped out of chairs like giddy price is right contestants, we thanked the academy and each other, blew kisses to our friends and fans then walked off arm-in-arm.
I had a lovely time, though I’m struggling to finish this post without saying something negative or self-effacing. Honestly I wasn’t terribly responsible the week after, spent time with visiting friends and went to various parties, kinda fell back into that unproductive hole I’ve been talking about in the last few posts. I have another busy day today and am looking forward to A.) getting back to productivity and B.) learning how to avoid said holes. Getting famous, living in LA and dying at 27 is a path i’m trying to avoid, it’s such a cliché, I want my story to be better than that. My birthday is in a few days, i’m taken with thoughts on mortality, sustainability and what I really want to be doing in my life. These heavy thoughts reflect a need to plan for the future, before it all slips away from me and i’m facedown on Hollywood blvd with all the other starlets who couldn’t get their act together.