I know holidays are tough, I have some tough things to say, CW.

Today is a day like any other day, some people get together with family and other people don’t. People bend themselves out of shape to get together sometimes, travel great distances in the worst weather… and that’s good I suppose. I really didn’t like this holiday growing up for reasons that are as plentiful as they are not fun to write about. That kind of writing is for my tell-all book or rainy days, with all the Content Warnings.

Today I’m returning from a gathering with a friends family that was nice, friendly, I had a good time, though I hate long drives and the weather is miserable. Today was a vision of this holiday I never had, the ones you see in TV commercials, the ones that I wasn’t sure existed. It was nice… but that insidious doubt still lurks within me, that I’m an imposter, that I’m less-than, that there’s something wrong with me and I’m one wrong word or action from everyone turning on me. That feeling still aches inside. It aches less and less each day, but it still aches. This really doesn’t have to do with being AB/DL or trans, just that general feeling of doubt/fear/mistrust that can exist within victims of cruelty. I still flinch.

The holidays can be tough and I refuse to wallow in my own misery. Every year before this, I’d probably be sad tonight and hungover and even sadder by Tomorrow. This year, I’m taking the time to sit down and take a moment to release the pressure, to be present and address the heartache. That’s the only way I can deal with it.

I’m going to watch the movie Planes Trains & Automobiles, make a yummy sandwich, get comfy in my crinkles and snuggle whichever stuffy needs snuggling the most. I’m going to wake up and face the day as the strong, loving person I know I am. I don’t have to let the past dictate my future, it may rear it’s ugly head now and then, but I have the tools to address and manage it. Mental health can really feel like building a sandcastle sometimes, though I’m working towards the Legocastle, something sturdier.

Big huge hugs to everyone on this day, however you spent it. I think holidays are designed to bring us together, but some of us haven’t found our Dinner Table yet. Setting you a plate in my heart, I hope you’re warm and snuggly, the bears and I send love ❤

1st 6 pics are Depend, then Goodnites, then Up&Up pullups 🙂
More stuff super soon ❤

Girls Goodnites Review!

Hi there friends, I have a new review up!

I’m a huge fan of Goodnites and while the video clearly shows that I think this is one of the best renditions yet, others have been not so keen on the changes. It fits better if you’re closer to the size limit, but if you’ve had issues with them tearing in the past these may cause issues. I can’t really test that but I’ve heard it from a number of sources that possess larger booty’s, my tiny butt hasn’t had any issues though I notice they are a bit cheekier, that boyshorts-esq butt peek.

To the fellas, I didn’t review the boys kind because I couldn’t find any of the new rendition, I had to drive pretty far just to find the girls kind. I’ll make it up to you somehow 😛

I also understand that I need to review the Always Discreet ASAP. I will be talking about those shortly, but i’d like to do a premium diaper in between, such as the MegaMax or BetterDrys. Also my Amazon Wishlist is available if you want to send me something new to try out!

Thanks for watching, more stuff soon ❤

An Apology

Hi there friends! I have a big batch of pictures for you, but first I want to apologize for something. Some kinda shaky emotional stuff ahead, Content Warning (CW) in effect.

I started this blog 4784 days ago (little over 13 years) and over that time I’ve had a great deal of correspondence with some really wonderful people. I have also received kind letters and messages from people that I haven’t responded to, despite my best intentions. Part of this is the sheer amount of mail, things getting lost, I have lost a number of accounts over the years etc. So some of it has been accidental on my part, but other times I don’t feel my advice is worthwhile or periods where i’ve retreated from the world, lost track of the important things.

I know i’m not obligated to respond to everyone, I’m not Ringo Starr, and a good amount is not worth responding to such as the overly crude messages, demands etc. Besides those outliers, I have had some really geniuine people write me and I haven’t responded, or responded and never followed up, and it makes me sad that I may have dissapointed some people just trying to reach out. And for this I apologize.

With that all said, when you’re writing someone online, especially someone who you can imagine receives a huge amount of mail, pointed questions and relevant compliments are good places to start. I get a fair amount of requests from people looking to chat or initially only have relationship motivations in mind, those I feel less motivated to answer. I am always open to new people but I also have some serious barriers to entry, mostly because I only have so much mental energy to respond.

If you are trying to date me (I’m not trying to date anyone ATM) then get to know me first, and if you want to get to know people online, offer them something. That sounds shady, but that something doesn’t have to be financial, it can be a new perspective on things, a compliment, a clever opinion, give the person a reason why they would want to respond. Sell yourself. It’s a gamble, you could take the time to write beautiful prose to an E-Girl (lol) and those messages could go in the trash or spur a wonderful new friendship, or you could write “hi I wear diapers too want to chat” and be 100% likely it’ll end up in the dustbin… to misquote Paul McCartney, the love you give is equal to the love you get.

I’ll go more into internet etiquette in time and some people are better at this than I am, I’m one of those introverts trapped in an extroverts body. Sometimes people are too much for me and it’s something I’m working on. It’s important to me to have these 1 on 1 discussions with people, make friends, and maybe even help people feel better about themselves. I do feel a great deal of regret about some of the people I’ve left behind… John Lennon said “Count your life by smiles, not tears”, and i’m trying to brings the balance of smiles up.

I felt the need to say this because I don’t want to hurt people, directly or indirectly. I feel I have hurt some people’s feelings over the years, especially when I’ve welcomed correspondence and then left people hanging. Some of those people are no longer alive, and while there’s nothing I can do about that, I can try to be better about it moving forward. So i’ll be continuing through my very full inbox and getting back to folks in due time, and if we’ve lost touch, feel free to get back to me.

No guarantees, but I’m trying to do better. If you’ve Got Your Mind Set On Me feel free to send a message my way, not currently looking for partners or playmates, but always interested in discussion among fellow diaper people. It’s gonna take patience and time, but I want to do it right ❤

On to the pictures! If you can’t tell, I’ve been loving these Northshore MegaMax ❤ First 4 pics are bedtime, last 7 is the very soggy morning after.

Thanks for listening. More stuff soon!

Song of the day: The Boxtops ~ “The Letter” ~~ Soulful beyond his 17 years, Alex Chilton shows why he’s the singer people write songs about.

yawny babby

Oof, I’ve been fighting this cold for a week, my throat is sore, i’m feeling super blah. I always have a week like this when the seasons change from warm to cold, having grown up somewhere that didn’t have seasons it’s been an adjustment. I also never eat potato chips, but I randomly did and had my first acne in a long time, lovely. My heart is warm and I’m feeling positive, just a little bit of a mess right now 😛

For some good news, coming Tuesday I have a new video all about “Fluffing” your diapers. I’ll also be doing an ongoing series of “Diaper Check” posts where I talk about what i’ve been wearing and what’s going on in the crinkly world. I’d love to do something podcast adjacent, interview other AB/DLs etc, I have too much on my plate right now, but as time goes on I could see finding space for that.

I also have plans to publish some of my creative writing as well as do more introspective blogging on here, but for now I’m setting stuff up, taking it slow. For today, my little brain needs some rest so I’ll just share some of my favorite recent pics, if you’d like to see them 🙂

First 2 pics are from my recent Judgeship work, I did comb my hair before I left the house. The rest are just me and various stuffys loving the Northshore MegaMax ❤

Life is good, a bit ill but will be better in no time! Hope you like the pics, more tomorrow! Thanks for reading ❤

Today’s Song ~ The Clientele – Since K Got Over Me ~ Twee indie for rainy London days


Hi friends, I’ve been posting a load of pictures on Twitter (@Rileybbq) and will be posting more here soon! I need to better my workflow so I’m posting here everyday with all my new pics, I’m working on it! Big hugs, more words and a new video soon, all that good stuff!

Just some pull-up pics with me and the Panda 🙂

Lots more pics tomorrow! Thanks for reading ❤

New Video Tuesday!

Hiiii! I have a new video! It’s basically 10 minutes of me romping around in cute pull-ups 🙂

There’s so many bad pull-ups out there I was motivated to talk about the better options out there for Pullups. I have come around to wearing high absorbency pullups more often these days as I wear more actively and just want something protective and comfortable, no hassle, just padded panties instead of regular ones 😛

I hope you like the video and as I mention I’ll be going more in depth on the better products as time goes on, those Abena and Northshore ones sure are comfy, I’m wearing one as I type this and I feel soft and snuggly.

More video and pics in the meantime, let me know how the video looks and stuff, I’m trying to mix it up with the presentation so the reviews don’t get boring. I realize this is about as far as I can go on Youtube. I can show off diapers, wear diapers, but no wetting, nothing explicit, and context matters, formatting things as a product review should keep me safe, my videos are no more graphic than a Depend Commercial… they just don’t look as happy to be in diapers. There’s way more graphic content on YT.

I will be posting other more explicit content to Pronhub and similar sites, I just want to maintain a presence on YT and have to walk on eggshells, not monetize my videos, do everything I can to keep in the TOS, age restrict etc, which lowers my viewers but watches my ass. And still, it could be gone in a second, I have lost accounts before and expect to again, but it won’t dissuade me. If my YT does get shut down, this site will always be a home for my content, the videos and cuteness and cuddles won’t stop.

Big hugs and thanks for watching!

Tena Slip Maxi Review!

Hi there friends! I have a new review video for you today!

In summary, the Tena Slip Maxi is a high quality diaper (or Nappy or Couche?) that has one major drawback, it’s EU exclusive. There are plenty of places to import them, but they can be pricey and sometimes hard to find. Great absorbency, great fit, strong but sometimes scratchy tapes.

I wanted to start out with a great product, my next Review video will be about one of the worst, the Depend Protection with Tabs! More stuff soon, thanks for watching ❤

Review Preview!

Hi Hi! I was hoping to shoot my new video today but ended up just finalizing my review system, setting up a template I can apply to any review. I wanted to have things prepared so the reviews all have the same format and my video workflow moves much smoother. That’s what i’ve been mostly doing, setting things up so when I get going I can stay going.

I plan to end each video with a card like this that you can use as a quick reference for each different product. I think I like the second one better, but the first one has a little more color to it. Would love to hear feedback! I want to make it obvious from seeing this picture that Depend Protection With Tabs is a fairly bad diaper. Anything else you’d want to know?

More video soon, a short explanation of the review system and a review of these Depend 3-tape diapers. Writing this right before bed with my bear in my lap and a Depend on, gotta do the research! Wish me a dry bed tonight, these Depends are not very trustworthy 😛 Thanks for reading ❤

Padded Love

Busy Bear Week!

Quick catch-up, the Election stuff went great and I went about my duties with care and precision. My laser hair removal turned out great and I feel much better about random selfies, more on that soon. The family medical issue I was worried about turned out great, surgery was successful. I even saw a bunny hopping around today after not seeing one for a while, things are going great for little Riley.

I also got my first Patreon person! I’ll be adding more stuff there soon, going to take this week doing some much needed catch-up on Emails and putting out a new video and all sorts of content! And if you’re reading this, thank you again!!!

But first, I took some super-cute padded pics recently and wanted to share them ❤ I love pads and it seems you can never find enough pad content online. I have a ABDL porn wishlist I should share with y’all… I have some particular kinks (shout out to medical braces) that I’m sure I’m not alone in.

And like my grandmother used to say, “If you can’t find the porn you want, make it yourself!” So here’s some pad pictures 😛 Maybe I’ll have to take some wet pad pics too, though I’m sure I won’t have an accident, I hardly ever pee my pants!

Have a lovely weekend, look forward to more pics and fun and padded love ❤

Song of The Moment ~ Bedhead – Foaming Love